fuck

[Maverick]

Thats funnier than those instructions on japanese electronics that are badly translated with things like "please to not immerse in water for danger of electrocution and/or death"

[rabbit]

ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!!!!!!

[Sloth]

They are definitely using translation software... albeit very bad translation software.

Get used to it. I think we are gonna see more and more of this in the future.

[mccutcheon]

To clear everything up they sent another email because I was a bit confused:

As said: It is sorry us this is tired of the shipment broken on the way
to them.
Happening. We can but this get this loss not replaced.
Perhaps we have expressed ourselves wrongly at the first e-mail:
You send us the broken product back and can himself for amount credited
for which natural then, for the it have paid "Happy Mondays Pills 'N'
Thrills and Bellyaches", one or several choose for disks her choice.
Damage resulted for for us of course they don't the have to pay.

Yours sincerely
Peter Peels

Sound45

[mccutcheon]

Martino what's up with these Krauts? Could you send an electronic postage in Kraut speak for me and ask what I should do, or what I get if I pay to send the record back.

[martino]

the guy is plain stupid, mc. there's no excuse for writing in idiot english -- even if you live among berks who cannot help you, anybody can use a simple dictionary and get better results than he did.

as i understand it, the matter is not simple. 'registered mail' is uninsured as such (i don't see the point of sending something registered yet uninsured but that's what they did). you could complain to the postal service since i would think somebody seriously mangled the package (vinyl doesn't just break when you drop it). but that doesn't sound so promising either.

if you purchased the record by amex or with a gold visa or gold mastercard you might be protected since they often include transportation insurance as a freebie.

you might also complain to your credit card company and try to cancel payment because you ordered a record and the krauts sent you some shreds of vinyl. you do have a right, i think, to cancel payment in case of nonservice or malservice. you can threaten to cancel your credit card in case they are not cooperative.

to the idiot kraut i would write this:

sehr geehrter peter,
bestätigen sie bitte, dass sie mir nach erhalt der rückgesendeten transportbeschädigten schallplatte den kaufpreis rückerstatten, oder aber mir eine vollwertige schallplatte ersatzweise unverzüglich zuschicken. vielen dank.

mit freundlichen grüssen, mc

ps ihr englisch ist unverständlich

(dear peter, please confirm that you will remit payment for the broken goods upon my returning them to you. alternatively confirm you will send me an unbroken record pronto. thanks and regards, mc
ps your english is incomprehensible)

ok?

by the way, love you too mark

[Sloth]

The way I see it, you orderered something and they sent it, properly packaged. It was the mail carrier who fucked up.

I know that all UPS packages are automatically insured for US $100. So I think its not the record krauts that owe you the money but the postal krauts. However the record krauts should coordinate with the postal krauts because that would be good kraut-like customer service.

All this talk about krauts is making me hungry for some Alsatian food! I will bring the sauerkraut to the picnic tonight.

[Sloth]

Goddam postalkraut berks!

[mccutcheon]

It was a postal problem. Some berk went and bent the thing at a 45 degree angle right over the fragile sticker. The problem I have with Peter and Sounds 45 was that they didn't line the interior package with reinforced cardboard. Everywhere else I've ordered from around the world has always done this. So anyway at the expense of another $50 I tried ordering another copy from a UK vendor. I got a quick response:


Order Number: MS142376

You have ordered 1 item from VINYLUK on Jul 31, 2003.
Below is the current status of your order with this seller.

MESSAGE FROM SELLER VINYLUK:
Unfortunately we have recently sold this item via our own website.
Apologies for any inconvenience.
VinylUK

[mccutcheon]

Danke Martino.

[Brett]

My Grandpa told me that there was once a Chinese restaurant in St. Andrews that got shut down because the health inspectors found half an Alsatian (the dog) hanging in the freezer. It gave the fried rice zing dammit!!!!

[marky]

No no no no no! McC, as entertaining as all this bad English has been, (and when I've had a few more drinks I'm going to go through it again and laugh myself silly) you're actually making this far more complicated than it has to be. I guess you didn't understand what I posted earlier. I will try again to explain:

You MUST GET REFUNDS THROUGH *GEMM*. That means GEMM, NOT Sound45. Gemm have a policy with some of their sellers (this one included) that goes like this:
You package the broken record and mail it to Sound45. You KEEP the receipt for the postage
and send this receipt to *GEMM* at the address I posted above (don't forget to include the GMR# of the order, which you will find in any of the emails you still have about this transaction). *GEMM* will reimburse you for both the postage you paid to send the record back, AND the total of the original transaction. Got it? Sound45's only obligation at this point is to let Gemm know it is okay to reimburse you, which they are trying to tell you they have *already done*. All the money you are going to receive as a refund is from GEMM now.
Got it?

Now, lest anyone think I still hold unnecessary prejudice against German record shops, I should point out that in the link I sent you, McC via email (Music Stack, or whatever that website's called) the cheapest copy of that record was actually being sold by another German record shop called Total Recall if I recall correctly. I am puzzled as to why you went with vinyluk as I know their prices are usually a bit higher than most, but hey, maybe you already tried the others.

I hope it's clear now. Ooh, I'm sad to think that kind of bad translation software is going to be used more in the future. Martino, all I can say is, thanks for your input and GOD I'm glad you're back. I thought you might have left us for good.

[rabbit]

yes boys and girls, its up to a sloth to save the future of translation software.