Bulletin Board of Bad Behavior

Saturday morning a couple of us are packing it in and heading south to the smokie mountains for an 8 day backpacking trip. I might be crazy but this time I might try to haul my guitar along with me. I just never know what kind of banjo toting inbreds I might run into that wants to "jam".

Hey Myke, I just saw Deliverance the other night. I think I'm scared now.

Myke, is it best to just submit yourself to forced anal penetration, or should i apply tactics like throwing dirt in the inbreds eye and quickly run away? But if I run, aren't there bound to be more? Don't they live in the trees?

All sarcasm aside, I'm looking forward to this beautiful land.

A few tips to make everything ok for you:

1) Know how to strum "Dixie" on your banjo.

2) Sew at least one massive rebel flag patch on your backpack.

3) Black out every other tooth with a Sharpie and smile widely whenever you encounter someone.

4) Remove all designer labels from your clothing and replace the ones on your jeans with the big plastic square "Wrangler" jeans logo found on their jeans.

5) 3 day beard growth = pansy. Long sculpted beard fashioned after Robert E. Lee = manly.

6) If possible, wear overalls with a torn or no shirt beneath and scuffed up steel toed boots from Wal-Mart with the Caterpillar name branded on.

7) If you encounter any Deliverance looking men, don't them you're enjoying nature on a hiking trip. Tell them you're searching for a bride. They might introduce you to their sister/cousin!

Keep these tips in mind and you're be just fine.

From the base of the Smoky Mountains ... c'ya!

myke

I've been to the Blue Ridge mountains and it was very beautiful. I have also been to Dolly World. And it wasn't.

ahh Myke, that was a great reply, thanks for the pointers! We will be starting in Tennessee (sp?) and moving towards North Carolina. The weather should be fine.

I've been to the Blue Ridge too. Wasn't but a few hours from where I lived. Oh god how I miss the hot HUMID summers and this wonderful thing called a thunderstorm. One day I'll go back and live there, I think maybe not Virginia but perhaps Maryland.

Dolly world? That sounds pretty cheesy. Where's that?

It's actually "Dollywood" and is in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. Owned and operated by none other than Dolly Parton. A country theme park.

myke

actually that place is great. just wouldn't want to live there.

and what i mena is only Dollywood, not the state or anything. I'm not making any bad points here. Like it was great going to Graceland but I wouldn't want to live there. what am I saying? I would be super cool, creepy to live in Graceland.