martino

Post by **mccutcheon** » Sun Jan 12, 2003 3:41 pm

I'm worried about martino. i hope he is on holiday because i haven't been in touch with him in a while and he hasn't been posting. maybe he went and had an affair with sarah.

Maverick · Post by **Maverick** » Sun Jan 12, 2003 7:31 pm

Those crazy Germans. Maybe he's off trying to convince some publishers to publish your novel so that you can be bigger in Germany than David Hasselhoff.

martino · Post by **martino** » Mon Jan 13, 2003 11:11 am

man, it feels good to be missed!

and i was only gone for a good week. anyway: i was skiiing in austria with friends.

basically, it was very nice -- lots of snow, freezing (twenty below zero) but sunny. and super food and splendid beer.

but those austrians are weird. basically friendly and talkative, but their taste in music is ridiculous, and they flaunt it to boot.

imagine this: you are skiing down a beautiful alpine slope, enjoying yourself, but as you approach a chalet you hear the blaring noise of cheapo-jovial, muesli-techno rhythms, with lyrics such as these:

"yeah i want to sleep with you all night, yeah i want to sleep with you forever"

or

"schatzi let's do it old-fashioned, like in the pre-rubber days"

or

"you are nothing near size 4DD, you are flatter than the red sea."

all this in german too (translations by me, yeah you're welcome), which makes it none the better.

the austrians love their stupid music and they play it everywhere. you get loudspeakers outside of mountain restaurants, chalets, bars; fuck it they even had loudspeakers onboard a gondola.

and they drink all the time. this is what you see all the time: red-faced, mustached, fat germanic guys drinking jagatee (hot red wine with rum and sugar and herbs), standing in their colorful ski suits around an outside bar, singing along to "we are the champions", roundabout noontime. after a few days, even i was drinking beer for lunch.

on top of this kind of fun, i got my car's engine busted and had to take a taxi home part of the way. the cabbie was a fat friendly bavarian who, as we rode to berchtesgaden, pointed out which bridges had been blown up by the SS in the last days of the war in may '45, and where the fuehrer's favorite cafes and mountain lairs were located.

it's nice to be back.

Post by **mccutcheon** » Mon Jan 13, 2003 3:32 pm

glad you are back. we have some new people here who have no trouble with the Pax Acidus life style- the only web site so strong it gives a contact high.

tashasimone · Post by **tashasimone** » Mon Jan 13, 2003 5:15 pm

i dont know you but im glad your back too!

Germans, they just dont rock...

Post by **Sloth** » Mon Jan 13, 2003 5:42 pm

Tasha, Martino is German.

German's rock! (Kraftwerk, Can, etc)

It's the Austrians that just don't rock! (Hitler, Sound of Music, etc)

Myke115 · Post by **Myke115** » Mon Jan 13, 2003 6:06 pm

My uncle recently did one of those family geneology things ... who woulda thought that with my blonde hair, blue eyes, and fair skin we'd find out we came to the states from Germany many moons ago??

Oh ... and I do drive a German car. A '92 VW. Still runs great ..

Post by **mccutcheon** » Wed Jan 15, 2003 4:19 pm

that is funny 'Germans don't rock'. I wonder how I missed that?

<Maggie> · Post by **<Maggie>** » Thu Jan 16, 2003 8:25 am

yeah!..let's strengthen the PaxAcidus-Germany bond..and make a thread about Germany...I rocked on mccutcheon's bed already or should I say floor? ...It was pretty x-tatic, wasn't it mccutcheon!

By the way: Ich bin auch deutsche!
I am German too!

chthonic · Post by **chthonic** » Thu Jan 16, 2003 11:52 pm

last oral sex i had was from a german guy - not bad - and he knew where to put his fingers.

martino · Post by **martino** » Fri Jan 17, 2003 1:34 pm

all this friendliness is touching! also, i am glad to hear that there is one other german guy who is good at oral sex.

as all germans do, i like to downplay my germanness and pretend i am a citizen of the world, or fuck whatever. so i do not feel so comfortable with the concept of a special pax acidus thread.

i mean, look at it. germany is the sick man of europe, economically. the people are fat and often uncharming. television is boring. the weather is pretty lousy. the only obvious redeeming qualitities, compared with the US, is that we have no death penalty and (currently) no saber-rattling government.

but i appreciate the interest, folks.

tashasimone · Post by **tashasimone** » Fri Jan 17, 2003 2:52 pm

im actually German, myself. I wasnt comming down on them, these are the jokes, kids. My maiden name was Jager, if that tells you anything. Natasha leigh Simone'. So, the only reason i can talk shit about germans is because i am one, which, at the time of my birth, made my mothers side of the family really angry, that my mother had picked a German fellow to shack up with, considering they were dutch, and Russian. Ha! God talk about a cosmic joke.
Quite a few good things have come out of Germany though, I do agree, a few good bands, a few good cars, maybe even a few good men, and of course, me! Maybe we should all do a projewct on Germany and do written reports on what we learn. (another joke) Im sorry i have to go now, my sence of humor is a bit off. Im still drunk from last night.

Brett · Post by **Brett** » Fri Jan 17, 2003 2:54 pm

I'm a British Citizen. Martino and I should re-enact Normandy, except without the pain and suffering. We'll wear our European style speedos and wrestle in the surf. I'll bring the Crisco.

Post by **mccutcheon** » Fri Jan 17, 2003 4:19 pm

"i am glad to hear that there is one other german guy who is good at oral sex."- martino.

so there is the guy who went down on chthonic, and who else?

Post by **Sloth** » Fri Jan 17, 2003 4:50 pm

Brett, how about we meet up in Vancouver next weekend?