New Burnt Face Jake Poem

Books, magazines, new stories, it goes here

This ones getting posted if the other one was no matter what y'all say

Poll ended at Mon Aug 16, 2004 6:54 pm

fuck you
0
No votes
i agree
4
100%
 
Total votes: 4

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bfj
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Post by bfj »

exactly, i need to eat and sleep but i just can't come down. and cigarettes and poems keep running through me head.
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Tommy Martyn
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Post by Tommy Martyn »

You might want to revisit the verse that starts "And what of Bobby remains?" It could easily be construed as flippant which doesn't gel with the rest of the poem.

Just my opinion though.
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bfj
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Post by bfj »

I guess that line speaks to my opinions on death and the afterlife. And although it doesn't gel with the rest of the poem it is very indicitive of my writing and my life. I seem to ruin the most sentimental moments with stabs of inappropriate language. Maybe it is to diffuse the intense emotion at the time... either way it is a thought tied to my experience with his death so i guess I'll leave it.
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