it's the thought that counts

h. · Post by h. » Tue Apr 08, 2003 7:14 am

"If I were there you would not be sad because I'd sing you a song." -m.g.

And I know he would.

Sounds so simple, doesn't it?
Just the words being said to me this morning made me feel a little less sad. It's good to have old friends who know your heart and mind, know the little ways to ease them.

marky · Post by **marky** » Wed Apr 09, 2003 4:32 am

It sure is, h. Dontcha feel lucky? I'm happy for you.

h. · Post by h. » Thu Apr 10, 2003 5:51 am

yeah, I'd be happy for me if I weren't eyeballing an island in the south pacific to run away to. It's great to know someone can make you feel better. It sucks to know there are more than a few who don't mind making you feel bad. Nor do they care when they do.
Don't worry folks, not taking cheap shots at Mc for once. Just thinking about a lot of things and realizing that the high road gets you nowhere besides fucked.

Jack Chiefton · Post by **Jack Chiefton** » Thu Apr 10, 2003 5:54 am

You're right h. Being fucked is great!!

h. · Post by h. » Thu Apr 10, 2003 6:50 am

literally being fucked is great, at least if you are being properly fucked.
Figuratively, no. Can't say that I've ever enjoyed the big O from someone else's bullshit drama.
But Jacky, I thank you for the sentiment.

h. · Post by h. » Fri Apr 11, 2003 7:24 am

miss ashana chenoa: happy birthday, where ever you are.
miss you like breathing. love you like the sun.
you would be 25 today.

Post by **mccutcheon** » Fri Apr 11, 2003 5:05 pm

I can't find my fucking taxes thingy. might have lost in the move. still, i'll come for veggie burgers and GE when i get a chance. maybe bring the Sloth.

h. · Post by h. » Sat Apr 12, 2003 3:03 am

2nd time this week where it was the thought that counted. I had a very unusual day with it's high and low points. I was lucky enough to finally get to see someone I haven't seen in a while and chat over coffee. It felt good to make art, just to be creative and enjoy someone else's good vibe. I came home to blooms upon my windshield. And to which, upon spying, the exclamation "what the hell!?" popped out of my 9 year old's mouth. Classy babe... but precisely what ran through my head. It is the thought that counts, and that's what matters.
Mc: when you feel you're up to it, let me know. Sloth and anyone else are welcome to join in the pigout/GE drink-in.

h. · Post by h. » Sat Apr 12, 2003 3:05 am

oh and Mc, find the damned taxes thingy. The 15th is coming up quick and you don't want to fuck yourself with penalties for being late.

Post by **mccutcheon** » Sat Apr 12, 2003 3:37 pm

email me your phone number.

marky · Post by **marky** » Sun Apr 13, 2003 10:46 am

h., I like your posting style. Kindof "Hmm. Life is strange, ho hum, well this is what happened to me today." It's like you've got some kind of emotional distance from whatever may be going on. That may well be a good thing.

McC I can never get it straight what email address works for you and I got rid of my old address so perhaps when we meet up again we should exchange addresses proper.

h. · Post by h. » Sun Apr 13, 2003 10:56 am

Recently, I dated this boy. And oh my! I was crazy for him. Thought him quite the cat's meow.
Yeah, he skewered me. Chewed me up and spit me out.
For the first time ever, I didn't say a fucking word. Aside from "yeah, that didn't work out..." because I was tired. What's the point in pleading your case to make the other guy look like an asshole? To me, he was. To someone else, maybe he has reason in what he did that would make sense.
He did bring up an interesting point though. He said to me
"we have a great foundation for a friendship..."
At the time, I was too busy screaming like a banshee to think about those words. In the week following those words I called in sick to work like a loser but for a good reason and had time to contemplate all that had taken place.
Now, I don't think that particular fellow and I have a great foundation for anything. Because what can you build on disrespect and lies?
But what if, after becoming friends with someone, those things happen? I mean, shit... people do stupid things all the time and don't know how to address it so they tell their reality, or what they wish it was...
I guess what came out of it is that I have people in my life who I love but we've fucked it up one way or another. In there somewhere is something that makes me happy and I want to keep hold of.
Someone else might not agree with me or respect my decision to continue caring. Doesn't mean I shouldn't do it, just makes it difficult sometimes. But it does feel good to lay down the arms at the door and walk in to a hug, even if the arms around you aren't perfect. Then again, mine never have been so who am I to judge?

I've found that the dead have a lot to teach the living. It's too bad it takes losing them to figure that out...