Bulletin Board of Bad Behavior

i am at this party, and this guy is telling me about movies, and he asks me whether i have been to the cinema recently, and i say yeah, to "the girl...", and he says how was it?, and i say,

it's like watching a mooncalf walk through a museum full of 17th century dutch art,

and he says,

uh, is that good or bad?

later, i say the same thing to this pretty chick, and she asks me to explain what a mooncalf is, to which she gets all flustered:

"that's probably the meanest thing anyone has ever said about scarlett johannson! you're probably just disappointed you couldn't see her underwear like in "lost in translation!""

and i say, to no avail, "no wait, wait, i didn't like *that* movie either!"

but you should have mooncalf.

good job Camel Toe. see you at the movies.

huh? you talkin' to me?

I love your shady ass. And that ain't Slim Shady. Just don't go gettin' beat up anymore.

I can recommend "Girl with a pearl necklace."

and just you wait, one of these days i'm gonna start calling you at 8 AM too, no wait: i'll call you at 7:30 so that i don't get my wires crossed with mykl

Girl W/ a pearl earring was slow as hell, but I'll say one thing for it...every rame looked like a classic painting. Great production design, but the story got lost in the concept.